Directed By: Mototsugu Watanabe
Starring: Shiori Kuroda, Nao Saitô, Shôko Kudô
AKA: This film was also released as Pink Salon Hospital 3: No-Panties Clinic
Trivia: Won for Best Film at the 2001 Pink Film Awards
It was way back in September of 2011 that I reviewed a little movie titled Sexy Battle Girls. At the time I said I wasn’t all that familiar with Japanese “Pink” movies, and would therefore be revisiting this bizarre little genre sometime in the near future. Well, it took me 5 years to do it, but I finally got around to another one: the intriguingly-titled 2000 movie Whore Angels, which is very different in story and tone from Sexy Battle Girls, but every bit as bat-shit crazy as that earlier film.
Having just arrived in the big city, Komasa (Siori Kuroda), all decked out in a skimpy cowgirl outfit, heads to the Hot Lips Salon, a high-class whorehouse that’s advertising for a new hostess. Following a brief “interview” with the owner (Jimî Tsuchida), during which she gives him a handjob, Komasa is hired on the spot, something that doesn’t sit well with her new co-worker Yuki (Shôko Kudô), who is the boss man’s main squeeze.
Later that night, while walking home from work, Komasa attempts to rescue a young girl who is being attacked by a demon known as “Rock and Roll” (Shûetsu Tôkaichi). Though she does eventually drive the demon off, Komasa is badly injured in the melee. After dragging her to safety, the girl she saved, who goes by the name “Monroe” (Nao Saitô), gives Komasa a kiss on the lips, which miraculously heals her wounds in a matter of seconds!
The next day, Komasa convinces the boss to hire Monroe, and within a few weeks, business at the Hot Lips Salon is better than ever (thanks in large part to Monroe, who, by way of oral sex, heals everything from impotency to blindness). Soon after Monroe’s arrival, a mysterious customer, Joe (Sin Yamazaki), begins to frequent the club, and is anxious to hook up with the miraculous new girl. But as Komasa and the others will soon learn, Joe is after much more than simple sex; in fact, he’s on a mission of mercy that, if unsuccessful, will bring about the end of the world!
Yeah, the above synopsis is definitely strange, but to be honest, it’s not nearly as insane as the movie itself. There are moments of straight-up comedy (Komasa giving the boss a handjob is played solely for laughs, and a scene involving a hammer is so over-the-top that it might just as easily been lifted from a Tom & Jerry cartoon), but Whore Angels also dabbles in fantasy (who or what is Monroe? Why does she have these powers? And why is her vagina shaped like a heart?), action (though not particularly exciting, Komasa’s battle with Rock and Roll isn’t a complete loss, and there’s a decent fight late in the movie between a couple of the girls), and even some drama (centering primarily on Komasa’s past, and what happened to her sister).
More than anything, though, this movie is jam-packed with nudity and sex. Like Sexy Battle Girls, Whore Angels runs for just about an hour, and hardly a sequence goes by where someone isn’t stripping or doing the nasty. In the extras section of the DVD, an expert in Pink cinema mentions that most films of this ilk feature at least 4 sex scenes (or one every 15 minutes). To be honest, I didn’t bother counting them, but I’m fairly certain that Whore Angels has considerably more than that. And while they’re all of the soft-core variety, each of the film’s sexual encounters is well-staged.
Clearly, there’s a lot going on in Whore Angels, and while I wouldn’t recommend it for everyone, those who have a penchant for erotic movies will probably like what they see.
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