#170. Massacre in Dinosaur Valley (1985)

DVD Synopsis: Action star Michael Sopkiw (2019: After the Fall of New York, Blast Fighter) is Kevin Hall, a handsome, young paleontologist, in search of the mythical "Valley of the Dinosaur" which the locals swear is cursed! When his plane crash-lands, Kevin wages a single-handed battle against the Amazon's most evil elements - treacherous quick sand, man-eating beasts, flesh hungry cannibals, and sadistic slave traders.  Presented in its original theatrical aspect ratio with all the gore and bloody entrail-rending, bullet hits, human sacrifice and impaling intact!

When you sit down and watch a movie like Massacre in Dinosaur Valley, you run the risk that a few of the story's elements may be relegated to secondary status, so that the filmmakers can squeeze scenes of graphic violence and gratuitous sex into the mix. The problem with Massacre in Dinosaur Valley, however, is there's no story for the filmmakers to even ignore. 

What we have in place of a coherent plot is a flimsy set-up, in which a scientist has hired a plane to take him to Dinosaur Valley, a dangerous stretch of South American jungle, so he can do some research on the area. Of course, others tag along, many of whom have no business whatsoever being on that plane (a fashion photographer and his two models, for example). This leads to the obligatory crash-landing that strands all of them in the dangerous jungle.  The expendable characters are finished off in good time by piranha and quicksand, leaving only a handful to deal with the real danger: namely cannibals and over-zealous diamond-miners. 

I'll be the first to admit that I'm pretty lenient in my judgment of films like Massacre in Dinosaur Valley; if a movie is ballsy enough to wear it's intentions right on it's sleeve, which in the case of this movie is sex and violence in a jungle setting, I'm willing to overlook a few structural imperfections. 

But come on...at least meet me half-way!

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